When You Assume…
Content Warning: This post contains some non-detailed mentions of examples of discrimination.
… you make an a** of you and me. Have you heard that spelling rule? That is the earliest memory I have of the concept of assumptions. As I’ve grown older, I’ve come to realise how much truth there is to that spelling rule- it’s more than just a trick to assist in learning how to spell ‘assume‘. Because in my experience, assumptions do not lead to good things. Quite the opposite- assuming can lead to misgendering folks who are gender diverse and loss of opportunities, just to name a few possibilities.
To borrow from a recent social media campaign (more here), assumptions have serious potential to become become reality. If we assume inability, ability may never be realised. If we assume binary gender, true gender expression may never be allowed to flourish. This goes for the people around us, but also those of us who assumptions are made about. Because heard enough times, assumptions might start to be taken as belief, when they’re not necessarily true at all. Assumptions are just a decision someone has made about someone else. Often, they are negative- you can’t do something, but, just like that social media campaign, they also have the potential to be positive. Not assuming, or assuming ability over inability leaves the door open to try. It leaves the door open for possibility.
If you have or are being subjected to assumptions, that doesn’t mean it’s impossible. Maybe harder, but not necessarily impossible. I invite you to use those assumptions as fuel to add to your drive to try, so maybe, you can prove them wrong.
And if you have assumed something about someone, I invite you to challenge your ideas. Why do you think ‘can’t’? I also invite you to be curious- instead of making a decision about ‘can’t’, ask more questions. Be curious. Try to understand more about the situation. Sometimes, curiosity is one way the seemingly ‘impossible’ may become possible, because of the ‘what if’ questions curiosity can bring.
If you’re interested in exploring this topic further, we’d recommend the following as a starting point;
Illuminating Insights’ previous blog about Biases